KISS YOUR AGENCY GOODBYE
VAMPIRE MARKETING AGENCY BLEEDING YOU DRY?
They promise growth, clarity, and “done-for-you” success — but behind the curtain, most marketing agencies have never built a real business of their own. They bleed you dry with overpriced retainers, hide behind buzzwords, and keep you lost in the fog. It’s time to take back control, gain clarity, and kiss your agency goodbye.
"Anything revealed can be improved and anything practiced can be mastered."
—Thomas Minieri
BEWARE: VAMPIRE AGENCIES
They promise growth, clarity, and results — but what they really want is your retainer.
Vampire agencies look alive, sound impressive, and hide behind buzzwords like “synergy,” “funnels,” and “AI-powered optimization.” In reality, most have never built a real business of their own.
Fake gurus skip the middle — jumping from apprentice to sage — pretending to be wise without ever doing the work.
They bleed you dry with overpriced retainers and “mailbox money” contracts for work that takes half the time thanks to AI — but still costs full price. They prey on confusion and fear, keeping you lost in the fog of dashboards, reports, and meetings that lead nowhere.
If you’ve been drained by one, it’s not because you’re naïve — it’s because you were never taught how marketing really works.
The Cure: Knowledge
Lemonology® Strategy No. 1: Confidence is Knowledge states that confidence isn’t born from hype or boldness — it comes from clarity. When you understand how marketing actually works, you take back control.
That’s exactly what Lemonade Maker® was built to do.
We help entrepreneurs gain marketing confidence through:
- One-on-One Coaching
- LIVE Marketing Workshops
- Implementation Support for websites, funnels, ads, video, messaging, automation, and AI
Save thousands. Kiss your agency goodbye. Take back control — and never get bitten again.
